Day 5

Wednesday I started small group, it's all women.  The title of the series is "Walk tHis Way".  So far we looked at the journey of Abraham, at the time he was Abram.  Most of what we've discussed as a group is what it's like to be on the Christian walk.  I can already feel that God is going to do a mighty work in me.  I've felt for sometime that God wants to move me from where I am.  I haven't been ready to move.  I feel a bit like a little kid digging in their heels with stubbornness.  I feel like the toddler that flops down on the floor in a tantrum and refuses to move.  That toddler has been me for the past few years.  I guess I figured if I dig in deep enough God will leave me alone and just let me stay where I am.  But my soul feels restless.  I yearn for more.  I feel like I have a hole in soul that only God can fill.  I know it all seems so cliche.  I just know there is more for me.  I'm scared though I'm scared to take the first step of faith.  It's like standing on the edge and taking the step and not knowing who or what is going to catch you from the fall.  I'm not ready to fall.  The Bible tells me that God will not give me more than I can handle.  I'm scared of what I can and can't handle.  I'm so scared that it has petrified me in place.  The fear of failure has paralyzed me right where I stand.  The good thing is I'm opening up.  I'm slow pulling my heels out of the dirt and ready to stand upright and take God's hand to lead me through what life has for me. 

“God loves you just the way you are, but He refuses to leave you that way. He wants you to be just like Jesus. ” ― Max Lucado